do you feel what i feel
by abingdonfan101
Summary: Jake is moving to Walford where he and Lauren become quite close even though it upsets a few people. Lauren's finally getting her life back on track, she's keeping her distance from Joey even if it's difficult, she's thinking about college... but the trouble is she and Joey can't be away from one another for too long.
1. Chapter 1

Eastenders

Lauren slowed to a walking pace before she took both her headphones out. Up ahead she could see Joey, she wondered if she should go over and talk to him… but no, she decided against doing that as soon as the thought crossed through her mind. She didn't need him; she told him he could sleep with whoever he wanted even if that bothered her.

Lauren was about to put her headphones back in and finish her run when she saw a very familiar face. "Waiting for me is one thing but turning up where I live is on a whole new level of weird," she teased lightly.

He turned around, his lips turning upwards as soon as he realized who was speaking to him. "What can I say? I just can't stay away." He replied jokingly.

Lauren laughed lightly at him feeling awkward, she didn't know what to reply with.

"So vibey, what you listening to?" He asked as he gestured to her headphones.

"Imagine Dragons, it's part of my running playlist." Lauren answered "My name's Lauren by the way." She added.

"Jake," he said holding out his hand, his smile growing slightly.

Lauren's lips turned upwards into a smile as she shook his hand, he had a firm grip. "Well at least I have a name if I ever need to tell the police that I'm being stalked," she laughed.

"I've already told you I'm not weird," Jake grinned as his hand lingered on Lauren's for a moment longer than it should before he released it.

"Sure," Lauren smiled as she averted her gaze to the ground for a moment before she looked back up at him "I best get back home before my dad sends out a search party or something." She added.

"It was nice bumping into you Lauren; at least I'll know one face when I move into my place." Jake said smiling "Maybe we could go running together." He added teasingly.

"I'll see you around then," Lauren said unable to stop smiling, she then put her headphones in and started to finish her run. She could feel Jake's gaze on her as she ran away and when she ran past Joey she didn't glance in his direction.

* * *

"Someone's put a spring in your step," Kirsty commented "who is he?" she asked with a smile.

"It's no one; I'm just in a good mood." Lauren replied as she leant against a kitchen counter with a sly smile.

Kirsty looked at her for a moment "I'll get it out of you one way or another," she said as she filled the kettle up.

"I'll have a cup of tea," Lauren said as she thought back to bumping into Jake. She couldn't stop the smile on her face.

"I'll make it after you've cleaned yourself up, you smell." Kirsty replied half serious and half joking.

Lauren rolled her eyes before she opened her arms "Aw, do you want a hug?" she asked as she stepped closer to Kirsty.

Kirsty took a step back "No thanks," she said even though she looked amused "Go on, you go get showered and the tea will be waiting for you." She added.

"Is Abi home yet?" Lauren asked.

"Not yet, she did say she'd be home for dinner though." Kirsty replied with an understanding look.

Lauren nodded her head "Okay… I'll go get showered." She said as she pushed herself off the kitchen counter and walked out the kitchen.

* * *

Lauren got out of the shower and made her way to her (surprisingly) clean room, the first thing she did was sit on her bed and check her phone. She had 1 new text. Lauren opened the text and sighed after reading it.

_Who was the guy earlier? Joey x. _

For a moment Lauren decided on replying and telling him to keep his nose out of her business from now on but instead she deleted the text.

Once she was dressed, she found herself sitting on her bed watching the time pass by. It was highly boring and quite sad. She'd have started a book or something if she hadn't of read all the ones on her book shelf. Her mind wandered to Abi and her amazing grades. She was probably going to go off to university and get her dream of being a vet.

Then there was Lauren… who didn't know what she wanted to do.

There was a couple knocks on her door.

"Come in," Lauren sighed as she turned to face her bedroom door; it opened to reveal Kirsty with a cup of tea and a couple chocolate biscuits.

"I said your tea would be waiting," Kirsty reminded her as she placed the hot cup on Lauren's bed side table then placed three biscuits beside the cup "You alright?" she asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just…" Lauren trailed off "I was just thinking about Abi going off to uni and me still being stuck here doing _nothing_." She admitted.

Kirsty looked at her for a moment before she asked softly "What would you like to be doing?"

Lauren was silent for a moment. "I want to be doing something; I don't want to stuck doing nothing. I'm thinking about going back to college… and actually taking it seriously this time." She answered thoughtfully.

"Well that's great," Kirsty said encouraging her "What are you thinking about doing?" she asked.

"That's the thing I don't know!" Lauren replied with a shrug.

"We could always order the college's prospectus or we could go into the college and pick one up?" Kirsty offered.

"I'd like that," Lauren smiled.

Kirsty smiled back before taking one chocolate biscuit and dipping it into Lauren's drink.

"Hey, get your own tea to dunk your biscuits." Lauren said feeling a bit better now.

* * *

"So Kirsty tells me you're thinking about going back to college," Her dad said over their curry take away that night.

"Uh yeah, we're going to get a prospectus and have a look at some of their other courses." Lauren replied as she took a sip from her glass of water.

"Well I'm proud of you," Her dad smiled at her.

"Really?" She asked as she placed her drink back on the table.

"Yes," Her dad said "You keep proving to me every day that you're recovering well and you stick to your routine… I just don't want you to think that you have to go back to college if that's not what you want." He added.

"It's something I want to do," Lauren reassured him "I just don't know what it is that I'm going to be doing yet." She added.

"We'll find something," Kirsty said sounding positive.

* * *

**A/N: So... this is ultimately a Joey and Lauren story but I'd like to put my own twist on the upcoming Jake/Lauren fling or relationship or whatever it is that will happen between them. **


	2. Chapter 2

Eastenders

"Thank you for coming with me to get this," Lauren said to Kirsty as she gestured to the college prospectus in her hand as they walked through the square. At the college they were told that Lauren could still apply to start a course in September even if it's late.

"I'm happy to help," Kirsty replied as she checked the time on her watch "Look I've got to get to work but we'll definitely have a look later." She added before she walked off quickly in the direction of the Vic.

Lauren was about to head home when Jake approached her. "And we meet again," He said with a smile.

"I have a feeling we'll be doing that a lot," Lauren replied smiling at him.

"I hope so," Jake said, Lauren wondered if he meant that to be friendly or was he flirting with her? She wasn't sure. "So college…" he said once he spotted the prospectus in her hand.

"Uh yeah, I'm not sure what I want to do yet." Lauren said with a slight shrug as she looked down at the prospectus in her hand.

"Well I hope you find out soon," Jake said "And when you're free, how would you like to meet up for a glass of orange juice?" he asked causing Lauren to return her gaze to him. He looked really serious.

"I… Uh, I would like that." Lauren answered.

"Will I have to wait until I bump into you again or can I get your number?" He asked, his hand reaching into his pocket to retrieve his mobile phone.

"I'm sure I can give you my number," Lauren said as she held out her hand for his phone. He handed it over and she typed her number in before carefully handing it back to him.

"There," Lauren said.

"I'll be in touch," Jake said before walking away, he looked over his shoulder and shot her a smile before she started to head back home, she was about to cross the road when she walked into someone.

"Oh sorry," She apologized then she realized who it was. Joey. Of course.

"Lauren," Joey said softly, this was the first time they'd spoken since she'd shamed him and Whitney.

"I'm busy," Lauren said quickly as she made to walk away but he caught hold of her arm.

"Will you just talk to me?" Joey asked, not letting go of her arm.

"Let go of me, I have things to do." Lauren said in a steady voice as she avoided looking at him.

"Lauren, don't be like this babe, look-" Joey was saying until Jake came back and cut him off.

Jake came to stop beside Lauren and fixed Joey with a glare "She said let go mate," he said in a serious voice. Lauren wasn't surprised when Joey decided to try his luck.

"I'm not your mate," Joey replied. Lauren rolled her eyes.

"Let go of her or you'll regret ignoring me asking nicely," Jake warned Joey.

"Jake, It's okay. He's my cousin." Lauren explained to him, that didn't change anything. Jake was still glaring at Joey and he kept clenching his fingers.

"It's no excuse," Jake said.

Joey sighed and released Lauren before he stormed off.

* * *

Lauren was flicking through the prospectus reading all the courses she found interesting, which wasn't many but there were a couple art and design courses that she liked the sound of. Maybe an art course would suit her better.

The more Lauren considered it the more she was growing on the idea. An art and design course would be really good for her. So Lauren carefully removed the application form from behind the prospectus and found a black ballpoint pen and started to fill out the application. There was a smile on her face at the idea of doing something.

It was around five in the evening when Kirsty came home; the first thing she did was sit on the sofa and take her shoes off with a sigh of relief.

"Busy day at the Vic?" Lauren asked from the table.

"You could say that," Kirsty replied as she looked over at Lauren "Do you want to go through the prospectus now?" she asked as she patted the seat beside her.

"Actually," Lauren said as she picked the prospectus and her application form up and made her way to the sofa "I've filled out the application form and applied for an art and design course." She explained.

"That's great, I think I saw that ad you did for your dad. He has a spare copy." Kirsty said.

"It's this one," Lauren said as she passed the book to Kirsty and pointed at a page, she watched as Kirsty read through the page. Every now and then Kirsty would nod her head.

"This sounds really good," Kirsty commented "I'm really happy you found something." She added looking genuinely pleased.

"There's just one problem though…" Lauren said trailing off.

"And what's that?" Kirsty asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Because I'm over 18 and just starting a course, I'll need to pay for the course." Lauren explained.

Kirsty shook her head slightly "That's not a problem. Me and your dad will split the cost in half and give you the money." She said simply.

* * *

_Do you fancy that orange juice now? _

Lauren looked at the text on her phone then at her dad who was sat at the table reading through the course she had decided to apply for.

"Dad, can I go out to see my friends?" Lauren asked hoping that he would be okay with it.

He looked up from the prospectus. "This sounds really good Lauren," he said addressing the college course first "I don't see why not but I want you home before 10. Okay?" he added.

"Okay," Lauren said as she replied to Jake's text.

* * *

"Did you pick a course in the end?" Jake asked once they were sat at a booth in the Vic which wasn't overly busy.

"I decided on an art and design course," Lauren answered nodding her head slightly "Why is it that I barely know you but I feel like I can tell you anything?" she asked softly as she cocked her head to the side slightly.

"I guess I have one of those faces," Jake said shrugging lightly but his lips were turned upwards. Lauren's lips were turned upwards into a smile as she brought her glass of orange juice to her lips and looked at Jake before taking a sip. That was when she noticed the wedding ring on his finger.

"You're… you're married," Lauren commented suddenly not feeling so good.

"About to be divorced," Jake corrected "Probably for the best actually, it wasn't exactly the best relationship ever." He added truthfully.

"I'm sorry to hear that," She said politely.

Jake waved it off with his hand, that was when Lauren spotted Joey and Whitney enter the Vic. They both immediately spotted her. Lauren returned her gaze back to Jake.

"'Friends of yours?" He asked with that smile that Lauren couldn't help but return.

"You could say that," Lauren replied, she didn't want to get onto the subject of her 'friends' and especially not on the subject about Joey. She really didn't want to freak Jake out.

"Well they can stare all they want, all I know is I've only got eyes for you too. I suppose I have that in common with them at the moment." Jake said as she shifted so he was sitting a little bit closer to her than before. Lauren was 99.9% sure he was flirting with her now.

"I'm pleased to hear that," Lauren said softly "I mean about you only having eyes for me… not them having eyes for me… I'm just going to stop talking." She said scrunching her nose up as she pulled a face. Now she's gone and embarrassed herself. Just _per_fect.

Jake chuckled softly "I'm afraid if you stop talking then you won't be much company will you?" he teased lightly.

Lauren nodded her head suddenly feeling comfortable again. Did Jake have this kind of effect on others too?

"So where are you moving in?" Lauren asked noting how close their legs were to touching.

"Near the B&B where I'm currently staying," Jake answered before he took a sip from his glass of orange juice.

* * *

"I had a nice time," Lauren said smiling as they came to a stop at the bottom of the stairs that led to her door.

"So did I," Jake said "We should do it again sometime." He added.

"Yeah, I'd like that." Lauren replied as she retrieved her keys from her jacket pocket.

"Well you've got my number, text when you're free." Jake said as he went to walk away when he stopped and turned to face her again "Good luck with the college course by the way." He added before walking off in the direction of the B&B.

Lauren watched his retreating figure for a moment when her phone went off signalling she had a text message. She opened it to which it read:

_Who's the weird one now? – Jake. _

Lauren laughed lightly before heading up the steps, when she reached the top she turned back to see if she could still see Jake. Instead she saw Joey standing outside the Vic watching her. Lauren held his gaze for a moment before turning away and shaking her head slightly as she opened the front door.

"I'm home!" She called out as she closed the door behind her.


	3. Chapter 3

Eastenders

Lauren was both nervous and slightly excited. She'd just returned to the square after handing in her application form in at the college. All she had to do now was wait for a letter for the date of her interview but until then she'd need to get a portfolio together.

"Lauren!" Joey called after her; Lauren stopped walking and turned to face him. "Hey, I'm sorry about yesterday babe, I realize now how much of a prat I've been." He said.

Lauren frowned slightly "I would've used a stronger word," she pointed out.

Joey chuckled and nodded his head in agreement "Yeah, I guess so. Babe, I see how unsupportive I was of your almost slip up. I'm proud of ya for spittin' it. I am. I just… babe, I almost made you relapse didn't I? That's why I didn't want Whitney to tell you." He explained and he looked genuinely upset.

Lauren bit her lip as she took that in and she didn't miss his gaze landing on her lips for a moment. "You didn't want me to know because you thought I couldn't handle it," Lauren stated "and because you were guilty. Blaming _your_ 'moment' of weakness on me hurts _more_ than you sleeping with my best friend!" she said.

"I'm sorry," Joey said softly.

"I know," Lauren said "but it doesn't change anything." She told him as she crossed her arms over her chest.

Joey looked at her for a moment before he asked "How can I make it up to you?"

"I honestly don't know," Lauren shrugged "What I _do_ know is that I want you to stop tip toeing around me. The smallest thing isn't going to break me. I can handle things better now. I also want you to _trust_ me." She said.

* * *

"Hi, can I have a tea please?" Lauren asked when Whitney walked into the café. Whitney noticed Lauren and for a moment she thought that Whit was going to speak to her, when instead she averted her gaze and made to leave the café.

"Whit wait," Lauren said quickly, she really didn't want to make anyone feel uncomfortable around her. Whitney stopped and turned back to face Lauren. "Did you want something too?" she asked.

"Na, you're okay." Whitney said softly, she looked like she was trying to see if Lauren was about to blow her lid again. She wasn't going to.

"Are you sure? I don't mind." Lauren said hoping Whitney would stay.

For a moment Whitney looked conflicted before she said "Um a tea please,"

Lauren accepted the tea given to her. "Sorry, could I ask for another one as well?" she asked politely as she handed over the money.

A couple minutes later and Lauren and Whitney were sat at a table. Whitney looked like she'd rather be somewhere else but at the same time she looked relieved. Lauren was going to say something when Whitney beat her to it.

"So… am I forgiven?" Whitney asked softly.

"Yes," Lauren said smiling "I was hurt and angry that you and Joey immediately treated me as a naughty kid when you didn't let me finish. I just… I wasn't going to be blamed for _forcing_ you and Joey into the same bed." She added finishing the last part sarcastically. Whitney looked ashamed.

"I know… it wasn't right of us. I'm sorry Lauren." Whitney said as she gazed down at her tea.

"It's okay, it's in the past now. It's time to focus on now." Lauren said nodding her head.

"Yeah," Whitney agreed softly as she tilted her head to the side slightly "So what's new with you?" she asked with a cheeky smile.

"Um, I've re-applied to college for an art and design course today; I'm actually really looking forward to it. Uh, I helped Abi's dreams of becoming a vet by finding a course she'd have to take to make up for her results." Lauren said trying to think of what _was_ new "Oh and did I mention? I don't drink alcohol anymore." She added jokingly to lighten the mood.

"Funny," Whitney said but she did look amused "I was more specifically asking about the guy I saw you with last night in the Vic." She said leaning across the table slightly.

Lauren rolled her eyes but she couldn't stop her lips from turning upwards at the thought of Jake. "That was Jake; I met him before my first counselling session." Lauren explained.

"It looked like there was a bit of flirting," Whitney said with a suggestive smile.

"I can't tell if he's flirting with me or not," Lauren admitted "He'll say something that indicates that he is being flirty but then we go back to just talking normally. Is there a difference there or…" she said trailing off.

"You'll know," Whitney said with a smile.

* * *

"_I miss you_," Her mum said down the phone later that afternoon after Lauren had been out for her run.

"I miss you too," Lauren said softly, she really did miss her mum and Oscar.

"_So, what's it like being back? What have you been doing? How's Abi?_" Her mum asked a sudden string of questions which Lauren barely managed to keep up with.

"It's okay being back. I've got myself a counsellor and I've reapplied for college and Abi's doing good mum." Lauren said answering all of her mum's questions.

"_That's great darlin', I bet the house is a mess eh?_" Her mum said laughing jokingly.

"No, it's still habitable." Lauren replied smiling fondly.

* * *

Lauren had her phone playing music while she finished washing up and since she was home alone she started singing along and it didn't long to get into it. "_I can hear the chit-chat__, take me to your love shack, mama's always got a backtrack, When everybody talks back, Never thought i'd live to see the day, When everybody's words got in the way_." She sang along as loud as she could.

The kitchen door opened to reveal her dad and Kirsty; she stopped singing when she noticed them.

"A word of advice, don't try out for the X Factor." Her dad teased smiling.

"I could say the same about you; I've heard you singing in the shower." Kirsty said to Max chuckling when he playfully pushed her further into the kitchen.

"You're meant to stick up for me," Max said playfully, Lauren looked on with a smile. She was glad her dad was happy and if that meant that Kirsty was sticking around then she didn't mind because actually Kirsty was really nice.

"She's not meant to lie to you about your terrible singing," Lauren pointed out with a sarcastic smile before walking out the kitchen.

"Oh that's right; you girls just gang up on me." Her dad called after her.


End file.
